Kim Kardashian does not have butt implants

Kim Kardashian is denying rumors she got butt implants and blames her curves on being Armenian, though she also mentions that she isn’t against plastic surgery. She tells King magazine:

“Everyone now says I have a fake butt or butt implant. I’m Armenian; you should see all the women in my family. The women have bigger breasts and bigger butts. That’s how I was born. I can’t help it. I’m not gonna fight it. I definitely need to work out more and tone up, but I’m proud of my body… [although] I’m not against [plastic surgery].”

And here’s some photos Kim did for Complex magazine. Although they don’t quite capture just how massive her ass really is. I guess they couldn’t afford a big enough lens. It actually looks like they airbrushed her ass down one or eighteen sizes. I guess printing it actual size would use up all the trees of the world. And yeah, maybe that doesn’t make any sense, but maybe you don’t make any sense. Ever thought about that?

Kim Kardashian looks different

Maybe I’m just getting old and losing my memory, but did Kim Kardashian always look like this? What happened to her lips? Did she get lip lipo? Does that even exist? Because I remember her having lips, and now, well, she doesn’t. Was it lip injections? Was it all makeup? How far away is the sun? Is Darryl really going to prom with Jenny? These questions and more, all answered tomorrow on a very special Superficial.

Kim Kardashian — more casual

Kim Kardashian recently did a photo shoot for Playboy. Us Magazine has just learned that Kim will be the December cover girl and the photos contain more than rumored. Check out the details:

A Playboy source tells Us that Kardashian’s shoot reveals more than originally planned. Though her body is mostly draped in sheets and jewelry, the source says that Kardashian “will show one boob, and her bare butt.” Kardashian’s 12-page pictorial “will be one of the longest spreads Hef has done in a long time.”

Longest spread Hugh Hefner has done. Kim Kardashian has gigantic ass. Must resist obvious joke… Temptation strong… Iron will kicking in. And we’re good. No, seriously, this is the greatest Christmas present I could ever get. Next year world peace could break out and the following year I could win a million dollars, but I’d just sit there, sipping my egg nog, saying “Remember that Christmas I saw Kim Kardashian’s bare ass? That was the best Christmas ever.” They should make a holiday special celebrating this event and show it to sick kids. Give them a reason to fight, dammit!

Kim Kardashian Thursday

Today, because she’s so hot, Kim Kardashian will take up all the posts on paparazzi this. Yes, I know how upset you are.

Kim Kardashian wins an Asscademy Award

I could make up a reason to post these pictures of Kim Kardashian leaving the Maxim Style Awards, but we all know the only real reason to ever write about her is to put up pictures of her butt. And unless she turns into a 500 foot tall lizard and starts attacking Japan, I’m pretty sure it’s going to stay that way for the rest of her life. She could cure AIDS, and she’d still be known as ‘that chick whose butt once killed a sumo wrestler.’ I don’t even know what that means, but I’m leaving it up anyway. That’s how I roll.

Paris Hilton throws a bikini party

Here’s Paris Hilton at the Malibu beach party she threw over the weekend that Elisha Cuthbert attended. And either she’s still promoting Rich Prosecco (canned sparkling wine) or she actually drinks the stuff. And why wouldn’t she? A classy woman like Paris Hilton? I’d be surprised if she didn’t drink canned sparkling wine. I heard one time she went to a party and was so classy the Monopoly man started crying because he couldn’t compete. True story.